Santa’s List for Filmmakers

Elf Express was supposed pick up my list for Santa today.  They must be overworked because I found a “Filmmaker Christmas Gift suggestion list” on my table instead. It seems that a nervous and harried elf found The Angry Filmmaker at home and took note of their conversation. I’m not sure what my responsibility is here but since I’m a fan of the Rappahannock Independent Film Festival and I am worried about filmmakers with empty stockings – I’m just going to assume Santa is online and post it here.

 Elf: What do you think filmmakers are wishing for in their stockings this year?

 The Angry Filmmaker: A copy of “The Angry Filmmaker Survival Guide: Part One” of course.

Elf: Er, ah…. O.K. That’s a good idea but listen; we’ve got a lot of filmmakers to take care of. They have to get ready for RIFF 2010. Do you have any more suggestions I can give the boss?

The Angry Filmmaker: A copy of “The Angry Filmmaker Survival Guide: Part One.”

Elf: Right, Well, ah, I don’t mean to be rude or anything but this is starting to sound like a shameless ploy to sell your book.

The Angry Filmmaker: You gotta problem with that?

Elf: No, ah… geez… you seem kinda mad…and… uh…

The Angry Filmmaker: That’s why I’m called The Angry Filmmaker.

Elf: Right. O.K. Got that. Well, I really just wanted some ideas for all the independent and student filmmakers out there and I’d hoped you would have a longer list and…

The Angry Filmmaker: Oh sure, there’s lots of stuff filmmakers need.  My DVDs, work books, not to mention Angry Filmmaker coffee mugs…

Elf: That’s not what I mean!  Maybe I should call someone else…

The Angry Filmmaker: Fine…. I’ll give you a list…. Peace on earth, pay my daughter’s college fund, and I’ll take a date with Jennifer Anniston. I hear she’s available.

Elf: Um. Er. I’ll have to get back to you on that. I think my boss is calling…

 (Cue to sound of small, padded feet plodding away)

The Angry Filmmaker: Have him check my website, www.angryfilmmaker.com and tell him this year no coal!